I often found myself searching for people and things I thought I wanted, but I never needed. I bought clothes I never wore, I bought shoes that didn’t fit, and I ran after every single person that dared to walk away from me without an explanation, and I chased down those who told me I was not the one.

I had always demanded to know why. Why was I not good enough to be the person you needed when you were more than enough for me?And I was never satisfied with any of the answers they gave. I just wanted to know when I’d be the right person for someone and I needed to know that there would be someone out there for me.

I needed proof because I was slowly losing faith in all the happy endings I used to believe in when I was fifteen. Yet, I couldn’t seem to find it no matter how hard I searched for it. So I stopped. I gave up for a bit, actually for a long time; three years, hundreds of days.

Then someone came along and reassured me that it does happen, that love is real, and one day I will be enough even if that person wasn’t them. They sparked the little flame of hope I had left in my soul. So for the first time in a long time, I find myself at ease with all the parts in my life.

I stopped trying to make people stay and create characters in my mind. I stopped trying to justify the things I buy when I do not need them. And I stopped trying to prove to myself that I am worth something more because I do not need to do that. I don’t need to search for proof to validate my own existence. I exist. And that is enough.

— Ming D. Liu, A Story A Day #146